all these hullabaloo about the billionaire death capsule reminds of last year when a local (Mexican) entrepreneur suddenly died at her home, and it was all tragic and such until it was revealed how she died.
You see, this woman created a religious brand for kids based on the Virgin Mary, obviously to appeal to the more conservative people here, it’s the tackiest shit you’ll ever see, and for a while in the 2000’s it was *inescapable*. It’s called “Distroller”, look it up.
Well, coming back to her sudden passing, she died when she fell off her couch. How so? Well, the tacky shit wasn’t limited to her stupid Catholic brand; her home decor was extra as fuck, including a god-damned couch elevator.
Yeah, she had a couch that could lift itself to the second floor, for some reason. And, obviously, this is a couch elevator that lacked any safety measures, like seatbelts, or anything to break your fall in case you slip. Which she apparently did, although the version going around was that she fell asleep on the couch, it somehow got up in the air, and she fell head first from the second floor.
And yeah, the whole “don’t make fun of this hilarious death” cycle happened as well, but come on. She fell from her elevator couch. Pretty sure the Virgin Mary received her with open arms after proselytizing for years.
I live for these stories, guys.
Couch Elevator was not something I was expecting to read about today.
since this is going round again i really want to state how much i truly do not need hair loss prevention advice. this comic is not about that. this comic is about learning to be okay with maybe getting bald. this comic is about how balding can be sexy. its okay. kim is here to help
Rewatching Truman Show for the first time in a long time, and the detail that’s stuck with me this time is the set design.
The characters drive modern cars and hock modern products, but it’s all presented with a veneer of 1950s wholesome applecheeked Americana. Truman’s life is presented as an escape for the audience from the drudgery of the modern day, and the aesthetic they’ve chosen for this is the post-war economic boom. This is the simple time, the movie says. This is the good time. Doesn’t the modern day suck? Let’s go back and see our friends from the days when life was good.
And it’s a lie. Truman’s life is a lie, and the image of white picket fenced suburbia they’ve presented is a lie. It’s an elaborate construction to recreate a false memory that’s comfortable for advertisers. The movie is a satire, but it’s also a very blatant statement against the nostalgia for a golden age which never existed. It’s a lie. It doesn’t exist.
I don’t know. I’m spitballing. I’m biased because I despise mid-20th century Americana and I naturally treat it with hostility, but it’s very gratifying to see a movie kind of agree with me.
Let me tell you a story.
Earlier in the summer, I went to Florida with my friend. We decided to visit a town nearish to where we were staying called Seaside, as we had heard it was a cute place. What I did not know at the time was that Seaside is the place where they filmed The Truman Show. It was a “master-planned community,” constructed in the 80s to be the perfect beach town.
Seaside, FL
Seahaven
And yes, it really does look Like That. Not just in their tourist-agency photos, in real life it looks like that. Arguably the irl Seaside is even prettier than movie Seahaven, because the the office buildings where Truman works don’t exist; the town is 100% cutesy homes and little shops.
Gravity legally cannot hurt you if you scream “NO GODS NO MASTERS” immediately before impact
I’m so fucking tired of this bicycle helmet discourse. Bike helmets aren’t going to do shit to protect you if you get hit by a car
Most of the time… Bike accidents…. Involve things…. Other than cars…… like the ground….also it’s safety gear….. Wearing it is non negotiable…. You are one accident away from being permanently disabled….. You need to protect your brain
Not towards OP
Is OSHA and other safety regulations also cop behavior?
*sigh* The belief that OSHA and other safety regulations are cop behavior are common opinions that people have, anarchist or not. Wearing PPE is annoying and often uncomfortable, sweaty, and cumbersome. People also generally hate being told to be careful, because they believe that “be careful” is synonymous with “hey, you’re too stupid to do that without hurting yourself”.
But all it takes is one time for you to slip up and suddenly the grinder disk that would have gotten stuck in your safety glasses is in your eye, or you’re getting treated for lung cancer because you didn’t want to wear your respirator while you welded. These are decisions that you were free to make, but might seriously regret later on.
People will scream until they’re blue in the face about how oppressive it is to have to wear a safety vest and hard hat on a construction site, but do you really think that the hammer that slipped out of your buddy’s hand is going to take that into consideration when it collides with your skull?
No political theory will save you from an accident. You can either wear your PPE, or can die, unexpectedly, painfully, and slowly. The choice is yours. Go argue with a lathe if you feel so strongly about it.
If u want to write a story about a character that’s just you but hotter with a dark twisted backstory and magical powers and a pet falcon or something, I think u should just go ahead and do that. Who’s gonna stop you? The government?? Fuck the police.
What if someone barges in, points at said character and scream, “Mary Sue!”
Tell them to come back with a warrant
This post came across my dash again and now I am having an absolute blast with self insert hotter me that gets the girls and guys everywhere.
This is the Way
Reblogging because I am very pro-writing whatever the hell you want, even ”bad” things, and also because “tell them to come back with a warrant” BROKE ME
it obviously makes sense, but one of my friend’s kids is going into swim class, and all the parents got an email today going, “when little ones are scared, they cling on to instructors. PLEASE trim their nails.”
i don’t know why that’s so funny to me, but just. the idea of this poor, scratched swim instructor having to make sure to email before each class as a reminder to please declaw the children SENT me.
When I taught swim lessons I remember trying to delicately ask parents not to cover their child in shea/coconut/olive oil before lessons.
“I understand your skincare regimen and wanting to protect their tender baby flesh from the pool chemicals, but COULD YOU NOT OIL YOUR CHILD LIKE A GREASED PIG before tossing them in the POOL? Thanks EVER so much!”
Some people say the Legend of Zelda series has too many different ancient sky-dwelling precursor civilisations. I say those people are cowards. The next Zelda game should feature the ruins of an ancient sky-dwelling precursor civilisation whose statues and murals all inexplicably look exactly like Tingle.
53 minutes ago
Anonymous
